Don’t fret

I’ve long thought that simply saying to someone ‘Don’t worry’, is both pointless and infuriating. If only it were that easy to switch off our anxiety. Besides, there’s sometimes good cause for us to feel apprehensive, even if we know full well that the worry doesn’t achieve anything.

Recently, however, I was struck by 2 verses from a Psalm which used the word ‘fret’:

“Be still before the Lord, and wait patiently for him; do not fret over those who prosper in their way,….Do not fret—it leads only to evil.” (Psalm 37)

As someone who does far too much ‘fretting’, I was rather drawn to this word and looked into its origins. It seems that it comes from the Old English fretan; ” to devour, feed upon, consume,” It tended to be used of monsters and vikings! Later it conveyed the notion of “wearing away by rubbing or scraping”, possibly from association with Anglo-French forms of Old French froter which was “to rub, wipe, beat and thrash”.

It made me, first, smile to consider worrying as being like coming under attack from monsters or a viking horde (that’s certainly how it can feel), and many of us might have found that worrying is like being worn away or eaten up. Secondly, however, it made me reflect on those pointless little worries, the niggles and perturbations, which don’t deserve our time and energy and which stop us living in and enjoying the present because we’re reviewing the past or anticipating the future, and diverting our attention from the people around us now. If I’m eaten up by my own concerns, I’ve less to offer others. As the Psalm instructed ‘Do not fret – it leads only to evil.’ The same Psalm also urges; ‘Trust in the Lord and do good’ – stop the fretting, leave the anxieties in God’s hands, and get on with living generously.

Meanwhile, when deeper worries can’t be shifted, how about this deeply comforting prayer for protection which I loved since childhood.

Deliver us Lord from every evil
and grant us peace in our day.
In your mercy keep us free from sin
and protect us from all anxiety
as we wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Saviour,
Jesus Christ.
Amen

Revd Kate McFarlane